I Love Hank Steinbrenner

Hank Steinbrenner is rapidly becoming my new favorite MLB team owner. As a non-Yankees fan, I generally think that anything an everything associated with that franchise has the taint of pure evil about it. However, Steinbrenner is quickly becoming an exception to the rule.

Of course, this isn't because of Steinbrenner's ability as a major league executive. Quite the opposite, in fact. As ESPN.com's Bill Simmons has repeatedly pointed out, "Kim Hank-Il" seems determined to take the lessons learned at his father George's knee literally: make bizarre, hysterical statements; play into media biases; spend money like a crazy person; whine when you don't get your way; and generally run your franchise like a lunatic.

Hank is the same guy who declared that the Yankees would not re-sign Alex Rodriguez if he opted out due to some gibberish about A-Rod not being a "True Yankee" - despite the fact that A-Rod is probably the best player in Major League Baseball today (here's a link to one of many firejoemorgan.com articles making that exact point). Hank paid several hundred thousand dollars to rip up newly poured concrete at new Yankee Stadium to remove a David Ortiz jersey an enterprising construction worker-cum-Red Sox fan had buried there in order to "curse" the Yankees, even though there's no such thing as a curse. As this blog post points out, Hank repeatedly threatens his management team with termination if they fail to make the playoffs - even though beyond actually assembling the team, management has very very very little to do with the action on the field, and given the complete randomness of an individual baseball game, it is borderline insane to fire the manager for a loss in one game (of course, Hank isn't alone in doing so - rumors were flying this weekend that the Mets were going to fire manager Willie Randolph if they didn't take at least two out of three from the Rangers [Ed. note: this was published about three hours before the Mets actually fired Randolph early Tuesday morning]). Plus, as has been repeatedly hammered into the ground in the blogosphere, Hank has also admitted that his favorite actress is Jennifer Love Hewitt, which should alone be enough to have him committed. At least he didn't claim Kate Bosworth as his favorite.

Anyway, today Hank decided to continue his insanity by calling out the National League for daring to have pitchers hit. Yankees "ace" Chien-Ming Wang tore a tendon in his foot running the bases in an interleague game, and it looks like he'll be out until at least September, leading to this Kim Hank-Il tirade:

"My only message is simple. The National League needs to join the 21st century," Steinbrenner said in Tampa, Fla. "They need to grow up and join the 21st century... "Am I [mad] about it? Yes," Steinbrenner added. "I've got my pitchers running the bases, and one of them gets hurt. He's going to be out. I don't like that, and it's about time they address it. That was a rule from the 1800s."... "This is always a concern of American League teams when their pitchers have to run the bases and they're not used to doing it," Steinbrenner said. "It's not just us. It's everybody. It probably should be a concern for National League owners, general managers and managers when their pitchers run the bases. Pitchers have enough to do without having to do that."

Um, Hank? This was kind of a freak injury. Yes, National League owners, general managers and managers are worried when their pitchers are out there running the bases. They are also worried when everybody else is out there running the bases. They are worried when any player steps on the field. They are worried when their pitchers step onto the mound and start throwing warm-up pitchers. THEY ARE WORRIED BECAUSE INJURIES ARE PART OF THE GAME, AND ANY PLAYER CAN GET HURT AT ANY TIME.

I'm on record as being opposed to the designated hitter rule, simply because I think it makes the game more interesting when the pitcher has to bat. There's no real right or wrong answer to whether or not the DH is good for baseball - frankly, I think it's one of the cool things about having two leagues with slightly different rules. I'm not a big fan of the DH and my favorite team happens to be in the National League, so I guess I'm more of a National League guy. I know people who are of the opposite view. Again, there's no right or wrong answer: it's just a difference of opinion.

That said, blaming Chien-Ming Wang's freak injury on a late 20th century rule change is borderline insane, and was probably said to distract Yankees fans from the tricky problem that the Yankees now have no pitching to speak of (which could have been remedied if they had made that trade for Johan Santana, but hey, hindsight is 20-20, right?). Anyway, Hank, keep it up: you're definitely entertaining this baseball fan.

Carcetti Reloaded

Gentlemen (and ladies)! It's been two years, but I'm back.

Two years ago, I blogged my way through most of my first year of law school. Over those glorious months, my readership expanded from a handful of people to double digits as I held forth on politics, movies, sports, and everything in between. Unfortunately, an abortive summer job search led me to delete the old blog, as I was concerned about its effect on the job hunt. I walked away, deleting my articles and dreams and leaving them only as a memory.

In the interim, I discovered something: I missed blogging. I missed being able to scribble down my thoughts and post them. I missed running into friends in the hallway and hearing them say "Hey, I read that thing you wrote on your blog, let me share my thoughts on the topic with you." I missed being able to make fun of New York Times editorials firejoemorgan.com-style. I missed my recurring "By the Numbers" feature in which I figured out exactly how much time I had wasted that day. Most of all, I missed the sense of being able to communicate - albeit in sarcastic fashion - with the online world.

So, I'm back. We can call this version 2.0 of my blog (or, more appropriately 3.0, if one counts my very very old Xanga blog); my blog reloaded, if you will. The key difference this time is that I'll be blogging anonymously. I dislike anonymous blogging in general - if you're willing to put certain thoughts out on the World Wide Interweb of Tubes, you should at least be willing to put your name on those thoughts. My old blog was published under my real name for that reason. Unfortunately, I am concerned about the effect a blog with my name on it will have in my line of work. It's not that I generally publish articles that are offensive or inappropriate - it's just that my efforts at sanitizing Google of unflattering references to me have been largely successful up until now, and I'd like to keep it that way.

So, in the absence of using my real name, I've decided to adopt the pseudonym of Thomas J. "Tommy" Carcetti, the ambitious and sleazy mayoral candidate (and later mayor of Baltimore) from HBO's The Wire. I won't be blogging as Carcetti - these will be my thoughts, simply published under Carcetti's name. I'm not wild about this solution, but this seems to be best for all involved.

Enjoy. I'm looking forward to writing again. I've got a few things planned for the future - like a review of Grand Theft Auto IV, sarcastic discussions on NYT editorials, and even an analysis of who would win in a 2-on-2 basketball game between the Obamas and the Clintons. Check back soon!