I Love Hank Steinbrenner

Hank Steinbrenner is rapidly becoming my new favorite MLB team owner. As a non-Yankees fan, I generally think that anything an everything associated with that franchise has the taint of pure evil about it. However, Steinbrenner is quickly becoming an exception to the rule.

Of course, this isn't because of Steinbrenner's ability as a major league executive. Quite the opposite, in fact. As ESPN.com's Bill Simmons has repeatedly pointed out, "Kim Hank-Il" seems determined to take the lessons learned at his father George's knee literally: make bizarre, hysterical statements; play into media biases; spend money like a crazy person; whine when you don't get your way; and generally run your franchise like a lunatic.

Hank is the same guy who declared that the Yankees would not re-sign Alex Rodriguez if he opted out due to some gibberish about A-Rod not being a "True Yankee" - despite the fact that A-Rod is probably the best player in Major League Baseball today (here's a link to one of many firejoemorgan.com articles making that exact point). Hank paid several hundred thousand dollars to rip up newly poured concrete at new Yankee Stadium to remove a David Ortiz jersey an enterprising construction worker-cum-Red Sox fan had buried there in order to "curse" the Yankees, even though there's no such thing as a curse. As this blog post points out, Hank repeatedly threatens his management team with termination if they fail to make the playoffs - even though beyond actually assembling the team, management has very very very little to do with the action on the field, and given the complete randomness of an individual baseball game, it is borderline insane to fire the manager for a loss in one game (of course, Hank isn't alone in doing so - rumors were flying this weekend that the Mets were going to fire manager Willie Randolph if they didn't take at least two out of three from the Rangers [Ed. note: this was published about three hours before the Mets actually fired Randolph early Tuesday morning]). Plus, as has been repeatedly hammered into the ground in the blogosphere, Hank has also admitted that his favorite actress is Jennifer Love Hewitt, which should alone be enough to have him committed. At least he didn't claim Kate Bosworth as his favorite.

Anyway, today Hank decided to continue his insanity by calling out the National League for daring to have pitchers hit. Yankees "ace" Chien-Ming Wang tore a tendon in his foot running the bases in an interleague game, and it looks like he'll be out until at least September, leading to this Kim Hank-Il tirade:

"My only message is simple. The National League needs to join the 21st century," Steinbrenner said in Tampa, Fla. "They need to grow up and join the 21st century... "Am I [mad] about it? Yes," Steinbrenner added. "I've got my pitchers running the bases, and one of them gets hurt. He's going to be out. I don't like that, and it's about time they address it. That was a rule from the 1800s."... "This is always a concern of American League teams when their pitchers have to run the bases and they're not used to doing it," Steinbrenner said. "It's not just us. It's everybody. It probably should be a concern for National League owners, general managers and managers when their pitchers run the bases. Pitchers have enough to do without having to do that."

Um, Hank? This was kind of a freak injury. Yes, National League owners, general managers and managers are worried when their pitchers are out there running the bases. They are also worried when everybody else is out there running the bases. They are worried when any player steps on the field. They are worried when their pitchers step onto the mound and start throwing warm-up pitchers. THEY ARE WORRIED BECAUSE INJURIES ARE PART OF THE GAME, AND ANY PLAYER CAN GET HURT AT ANY TIME.

I'm on record as being opposed to the designated hitter rule, simply because I think it makes the game more interesting when the pitcher has to bat. There's no real right or wrong answer to whether or not the DH is good for baseball - frankly, I think it's one of the cool things about having two leagues with slightly different rules. I'm not a big fan of the DH and my favorite team happens to be in the National League, so I guess I'm more of a National League guy. I know people who are of the opposite view. Again, there's no right or wrong answer: it's just a difference of opinion.

That said, blaming Chien-Ming Wang's freak injury on a late 20th century rule change is borderline insane, and was probably said to distract Yankees fans from the tricky problem that the Yankees now have no pitching to speak of (which could have been remedied if they had made that trade for Johan Santana, but hey, hindsight is 20-20, right?). Anyway, Hank, keep it up: you're definitely entertaining this baseball fan.

Gradumacation Day

About 18 hours ago, I graduated from law school.

(Waits for applause)

(Suddenly realizes he used this same joke two posts ago)

Ahem.

Anyway.

I will have more to say about my law school experience at some point, but for now, I wanted to leave you all with two brief comments.

First, my complete and utter excitement at our entrance music today. Our graduation ceremony was held in the Harper Quadrangle, an outdoor forum. I was quite delighted to discover that we would be entering with a group of bagpipers leading the way (kilts and all) and doubly delighted to discover that their first musical selection was Scotland the Brave, the unofficial Scotch national anthem. Of course, I was excited merely because this particular tune also doubles as Rowdy Roddy Piper's entrance music from both WWF and WCW:



Enjoy Rowdy Roddy Piper's entrance. I always do.

Anyway, I also wanted to express a quick thanks to all my classmates from the past three years. You all have made law school an overall enjoyable experience, and I don't know where I would be without you.

As I was driving back home from dinner with my family this evening, the song "Body of an American" by The Pogues came on. This song was known as the song played on The Wire as a farewell for departed characters, and I can think of no better tribute to those friends I have made over the last few years than the sentiments expressed therein:




Anyway, I love you all. I'll stop being sentimental tomorrow, I promise, but for now, just know that I appreciate and love you all.

Carcetti out.

2162 Votes

Congratulations to presumptive Democratic nominee Sen. Barack Obama.



In the words of Sen. Arnold Vinick: "Okay. Let's go win this thing."

I'm So Excited! I'm So Excited! I'm So... Scared!

Apologies for not posting much lately. I spent last week pulling double-duty, running from final exams in the morning to my bar exam prep course in the afternoon. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank both the University of Chicago Law School and Bar/Bri for their thoughtful course scheduling that made my life a living hell last week. On the plus side, I'm now entirely done with law school.

(Waits for applause)

Ahem. Okay. Well then.

Anyway, I had planned a whole introspective post on law school, but let's be honest, you don't really want to read that. How about a "By the Numbers" post instead? I haven't written one yet for CarcettiBlog v.3.0. Consider this my graduation gift to you all.

Oh, also, I'm currently trying to give up caffeine, so if my thoughts seem a little, well, hazy and unclear, that's probably because I haven't woken up yet.

Carcetti By the Numbers

Days Without Caffeine: 2

Number of Times I Almost Fell Asleep in Yesterday's Bar/Bri Class: 3

Expected Number of Times I Will Almost Fall Asleep in Today's Bar/Bri Class: 5

Likely Correlation Between My Efforts to Give Up Caffeine and My Falling Asleep in Bar/Bri Class: 100%

Time I Woke Up This Morning: 7:15

Current Time: 11:45 A.M.

Number of Hours Spent While Groggy: 4.5

Likely Correlation Between My Efforts to Give Up Caffeine and My Current Grogginess: 100%

Hours Played of MLB 08: The Show Over the Last Four Days: ~10.

Video Derrek Lee's Stats (Through Video June 1): .475/.514/.616/1.130; 88 hits; 6 HR; 35 RBI; 35-of-39 stolen bases.

Real Derrek Lee's Stats (Through June 3): .293/.349/.531/.880; 70 hits; 13 HR; 37 RBI; 3-of-5 stolen bases.

Absurdity Level: Incalculable

Approximate Age of the Woman Who Hit On Me in the Bar on Saturday Night: ~35

Number of Children She Had: 3

Age of the Oldest Child: 16

Age of My Youngest Sister: 16

Minutes Spent Talking To Her After This Revelation: 1

Number Of Times I've Related This Story in the Past Three Days: ~10

Hours Spent on the El in the Last Two Days: ~4

Hours Spent Jogging in the Last Two Days: 1.6

Hours of Train Ride Spent Reading Sports Illustrated: 2

Hours of Train Ride Spent Watching Battlestar Galactica on My Video iPod: 2

Hours Spent Reading For Class at Home: 2

Possibility That I Could Just Kill Three Birds With One Stone and Listen to Bar/Bri Lectures While Jogging: 0%

Number of Curse Words Shouted Upon the Last Realization: ~12 (Depending on whether you count "son of a..." as three words or part of the larger curse phrase)

Estimated Number of Whiny Posts in the Near Future About How Bored I Am at Bar Exam Prep Course: 5